bloodteethandflame

A life in threes

Tag: listening

Another distraction.

Before I got distracted, there was something that I’d been meaning to write about for a long time now.

A topic that I tried to write about it before – about the epiphany I’d had earlier this month regarding ambient noise – and I recalled that it was about being an empath.

As a child, the more sensitive I became – the more emphatic I became – the more that sort of noise calmed me, made me feel safe.  Because I was afraid.

I wrote about how I used to crave the comfort of sound – the t.v, music, talking! –  but how once I started getting in touch with Them (realizing and following my path) – suddenly I wanted quiet.  I needed quiet.

I get irritable with the noise that seems constantly present these days.

I don’t mind so much I suppose by ambient noise being present during the day – such is life, such is the sound of human activity…but

At night?

It reminds me…. the familiar sort of noise – the drone of the television especially- that seems calculated to mask, so one can *think* – perhaps even so one cannot get distracted by Them.

I wonder because it’s the exact masking tactics I used throughout my childhood…using repetitive ambient sound as a cover that masks the overwhelming silence.

Maya Angelou’s final words, her last post on Twitter message concerned this very concept:

 “Listen to yourself and in that quietude you might hear the voice of God.”

Voice of God, indeed.

There was a time when I ran from that quietude, when I ran from myself, and from Them and Their messages.

 

This is no longer true of me.

 

 

 

 

 

(Not so) Subtle

This past week has been a rollercoaster of emotions.

And no, I don’t like it that way, and thus, I continue to work on developing more effective coping skills.

As well, I am reminded that it is not selfish to take care of myself when necessary.

But I will get there.

And when I am surfing the web, and I come across pieces like this

http://www.rebellesociety.com/2015/01/09/bring-your-all-to-me/

 

And I am reminded that I am loved, and that there is no shame in asking for help.

 

I am grateful.