bloodteethandflame

A life in threes

Tag: Rumi

Song for Tuesday: Can’t Find My Way Home

 

This song has always given me a weird feeling.
I can’t exactly explain it – except to admit that the lyrics used to give me a strange tight discomfort in my chest, even though I’ve always found its melody hauntingly beautiful.

Was it a song about magic?
Or perhaps… a song about death?

When I was young, I did not know.

But I can’t help but recall that my older sister would often sing the lyrics – making sure to mimic the young Steve Winwood’s high pitched plaintive voice and making a mockery of the British way he pronounced can’t (like caunt) –  and I would nervously laugh and laugh, and beg her to stop.

Oh, the nervous laughter we shared over that song!

Back then, I didn’t know what it was about…

or what made me so uncomfortable about that song.

And I definitely did not know what it was about this song that invited so much ridicule from my older sister…. and yet…

And yet…

Some thirty-odd years later, we got to talking about the song recently…and we admitted to one another that we’d always liked that song.

Funny that, eh?

Perhaps we are getting old.

~~~

Nowadays, I have begun to speculate what the song is about.

Or rather, I have become certain of what that song means to me.

It is a song about surrender.

Perhaps what had made me uncomfortable about the song was its tone – which now strikes me as a tone of surrender:

“Come down off your throne and leave your body alone. Somebody must change
You are the reason I’ve been waiting so long – somebody holds the key
Well, I’m near the end and I just ain’t got the time
And I’m wasted and I can’t find my way home

Come down on your own and leave your body at home – somebody must change
You are the reason I’ve been waiting all these years – somebody holds the key
Well, I’m near the end and I just ain’t got the time
And I’m wasted and I can’t find my way home…”

-lyrics written and sung by Steve Winwood/Blind Faith

 

As a matter of fact, while it is still true that it might be a song about fear of death or old age, that plaintive chorus of I can’t find my way home never fails to fill me with this unshakeable sense of loneliness and loss.

Perhaps the song is an extended and powerful metaphor of loss.

Or

Is it about someone who is spiritually seeking?

As it was with the mystic poet Rabindranath Tagore who wrote:

Where roads are made I lose my way.

In the wide water, in the blue sky there is no line of a track.

The pathway is hidden by the birds’ wings, by the star-fires, by the flowers of the wayfaring seasons.

And I ask my heart if its blood carries the wisdom of the unseen way….

                                                                                  (Fruit Gathering, verse 6)

 

In that regard, this song makes me think of madness, perhaps even seidhr.

 

Rumi drunk insane

 

You are the reason I’ve been waiting all these years…
Somebody holds the key…

thekeythatopens

Month for Loki, Day 23: Mirror

There are a few particular things that have cropped up again and again in my devotional practice with Loki over the years, and I thought I’d write about one of these today, involving mirrors.

Almost from the beginning, whether it be in meditations, dreams or visuals, Loki has always directed me to consider mirrors, and the concept of mirrors.

At first, I was confused, wracking my brain for what it could mean – these visuals of mirrors, references to mirrors and all these literal and metaphorical meanings associated with mirrors.

And it got me to thinking about posts I’ve made in the past regarding the various angles I’ve considered when faced with a visual or a reference to mirrors…and it amazes me now to think of all of the layered paths that this one thing has led me to.

In the beginning, I thought Loki was making some sort of commentary about appearances, and perhaps, self-love…maybe even conceit.

But then as time went on, I began to wonder if the reference to mirrors was Loki indicating the importance of self-work.

And then, there’s the term, mirroring – which can be understood as a form of body language – born of the human desire to ‘cognitively sync’ with others – on an unconscious level. (But there’s another layer to mirroring which is done on a conscious level by those seek to engage/teach/engender desired behavior while generating empathy and connection, by therapists, teachers, and salespeople.)

And then, I came across this concept – of what you expect is what you will receive – by way of the Bhagavad Gita.  A helpful tidbit of information to be sure, but even more so on another level, as this particular bit can be found in the fourth chapter, eleventh verse – an amusing coincidence that I came across the 411 (information!) quite by chance in a religious text that was unfamiliar to me at that time, and suddenly I was making the connection to how the Gods can act as mirrors.

With that reference, and what followed was to discover myself being re-directed to a mystic path, complete with nudges toward Rumi

    

 

Hafiz:

and Pema Chödrön:

 

which re-iterated the message that we are reflections of the Gods, as well as the Gods can be reflections of us, and sometimes how we are caught gazing into each others’ eyes, or perhaps dancing, but more often than not, caught up in the illusion of separation from Them, if not downright rejection of Their messages to us.

~~~

But what do I know?  Loki has a thing with mirrors, I suppose.

But I’m not the only one who sees this connection, as a fellow member of a Lokean group shared this observation:

    “I wanted to understand why so many saw hatred, rage, evil in Loki. I didn’t understand how His reputation could be so different from what I personally experienced. The message I received back is that Loki is a mirror. Many of the gods are, but Him especially. The reason some get back hatred and fear is because they give Him hatred and fear.

But when you give Him love and laughter, He sends it back and magnifies it. So the love that you feel coming from Him, the kind that brings tears to the eyes, is a reflection of the beauty of your own heart.”

~~~

And finally, the surprise (which should not surprise me now) that I came across the other day…while searching for something else entirely.

I was looking for the references to the Spegilmynd – as it is the basis for a powerful runic sigil that mirrors negative energy sent against oneself and reflects it back to the sender:

 

 

And I stumbled upon this definition on Glosbe, an online Icelandic dictionary service:

Spegilmynd (Icelandic) noun – “mirror, reflection, echo”

and the provided contextual example was a portion of an Icelandic prayer:

(Icelandic) “Það er bæn mín og blessun að þegar þið virðið fyrir ykkur eigin spegilmynd, munuð þið sjá handan ófullkomleikans og sjálfsefans og greina hver þið sannlega eruð: Dýrðlegir synir og dætur almáttugs Guðir.“

(Trans. English) “It is my prayer and blessing that when you look at your reflection, you will be able to see beyond imperfections and self-doubts and recognize who you truly are: glorious sons and daughters of the Almighty Gods.”

 

It’s funny how these concepts circle around again and again.

 

 

Come, come, whoever you are…

Come, Come, whoever you are.

Wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving.

It doesn’t matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair.

Come, even if you have broken your vows a thousand times.

Come, yet again, come.

~Rumi~

 

(Artwork: Reaching Out a sketch by akemimiu at DeviantArt)

firepexelsRumi

Month for Loki, Third: Offerings of Joy.

“Come sit with me! Let us drink the holy wine of happiness.”

-Rumi

 

Today, a Lokean acquaintance of mine wrote of how she had recently been sitting by a fire outdoors, thinking of Loki, when she’d suddenly felt the urge to dance, so she asked if dancing would be an appropriate offering for Loki.

I responded that dancing would definitely serve as a fine offering for Loki.

Loki loves receiving offerings of joy from His devotees – dancing, singing, playing, creating…

Another group member joined the conversation to point out that most Gods – not just Loki in particular – would accept any offering made in the spirit of joy.

I would have to agree, as the concept of offering our Gods our joy got me to thinking of my own experiences with Loki.

I believe that Loki is a God particularly attracted to intensity.  And what are Gods but energetic beings?  Therefore, I believe Loki is drawn to the expression of a wide range of energies, and how energy manifests in humans is often expressed through emotions.

And joy, like grief and rage, is an emotion associated with intense levels of energy.

Or to put it another way, in my experience, Loki’s level of voracious energetic hunger is quite similar to that of His son, Fenrir.

Loki will accept offerings of pain, rage and sadness if one chooses to offer these emotions to Him.  While Loki has certainly experienced His share of these intense emotional energies, I have experienced Him as equally voracious for joy and merriment.

He will feast upon joy and laughter and passion just as readily.

And so, in this Month for Loki, I urge you to invite Loki to your table.

Invite Him to share in the feast of your delight, your contentment, your joy.

He will partake of your joys just as heartily and make a glutton of Himself just as readily on your laughter and happiness.

Be generous with the wine of your thanks, and allow Him to drink His fill of that holy wine.

I promise, you won’t regret it.

~~~

Hail Loki, Honored Guest!

 

 

 

 

 

Poem

This lovely poem was shared by a friend on my social media feed this morning, and though I was skeptical that its words ‘could change one’s life,’ I will grant that its overall message is rather profound one…and personally relevant.

(Thanks Sarah!)

~~~

THE GUEST HOUSE

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.

Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

Jelaluddin Rumi,
Translation from The Essential Rumi by Coleman Barks