bloodteethandflame

Lately, I’ve been feeling sad and a bit overwhelmed.

And maybe my brain knows it, as I’ve been having this particularly vivid and repetitive dream that a large red fox has somehow gotten inside my home.

And I’ve been having this dream several nights in a row now.

Though I cannot think of what this fox being loose in my house could represent – but since I know that the subconscious mind operates in metaphors – I’ve been examining its behavior in the dream these last two nights, looking for clues.

The first night that I had the dream, when the fox got in, it ran around the house – wild, unpredictable – knocking over things, and chasing and loudly challenging our three cats and two dogs.

And no matter how much I tried to capture it – with makeshift traps or nets – it could not be contained. 

I tried to lure it back outside with food or toys, trying to catch its interest with something, anything…but I could not get it to leave the house.

Then, the next two times, I think that I’d started to acquiesce to its presence in my house, no matter how much I was still annoyed with it, because it had taken up residence in my bedroom, lying just underneath my side of the bed, alternately growling and yipping whenever I tried to engage with it. My dogs and cats seemed curious about it, but I felt like I had to keep them out of the bedroom for their own safety, because a fox is still a wild animal — as my calls to Animal Control went unanswered.

And then, I started to wonder if the fox was a problem that wanted to attach itself to me, and not in a good way, since it made noise all through night and day, no matter how much I tried to appease it with food or water or blankets or pet toys….because it didn’t seem to want to leave, but it also seemed loudly opposed to being in my house as well.

And Animal Control still wouldn’t return my calls.

But, in the last two nights’ dreams, oddly enough, the fox would sometimes crawl out from under the bed to watch me as I read a book or watch TV, or to lick and nibble at my hands sometimes in the middle of the night, waking me up from sleep, as if it now wanted my attention…

But it doesn’t seem to want to leave! 

___

A fox under my bed.

Who doesn’t belong

But will not leave.

I don’t know what it means.

But I’ve had these dreams of a fox in my house for five, six nights now.

*sigh*