I’m in a weird place. In my head.
People are calling me, people are texting me.
People are concerned for me.
They are sweet, kind, understanding. They ask me how I feel; how I am doing.
I don’t know.
I called V this morning, and it felt weird, and he dodged a lot.
I don’t know what to think.
It makes me sad, it makes me worried.
Things are still the same in the situation – we both talk calmly, but there’s an underlying tension.
He and I talked for close to an hour, but it seemed to go nowhere, no matter how long we talked, no matter what was said.
I feel calm, and feel OK…but then I get overwhelmed with emotion.
It feels like a mindfuck.
And not in a good way.